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silver
Novice
Posts:4
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| 01/26/2006 1:20 PM |
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OBITUARY
Lieutenant John (Jack) Silver
Jack Silver, late of Tooting Graveney, Sussex, died suddenly last week. The news, while greeted mainly favourably, has sent a shockwave through the European armaments and brothel industries.
The cause of death is of yet unknown. Those who knew Jack always suspected his death would be caused either by liver failure or the terminal symptoms of the French Pox. However, a group of Cavaliers have testified that they observed Jacks demise personally. Speaking anonymously, one said "We saw him riding fast, and then he just keeled over. He must have fallen on some bullets, which would account for the numerous bullet holes in him. I don't think that killed him, because he still tried to get up. He must have nicked himself on his own sword, and that would account for the 32 separate stab wounds on his back."
According to these same bystanders, his last words were "gack".
A brief eulogy was given by his cousin, Montague Jones. "Jack left England at an early age and joined the army for a career on the Continent. Despite the best efforts of six nations, thirteen armies, and most of his friends and acquaintances, he just wouldn’t die. But age and massed musketry fire will take its effect on the luckiest of us, and his time, thankfully, has run out".
"I would like to say that Jack was a good man, and a kind man. This, of course, is a bare faced lie, monstrous to God. Suffice to say, he is dead and we are glad". Puritan hymns were then sung, because all agreed that Jack would have hated that.
Jack will be remembered most for his strong odor. He leaves to mourn a succession of scorned women, and scores of bastard children. Upon hearing the news of his demise, reaction was mixed between extreme joy and mere happiness.
Internment was in a ditch somewhere along the Kings Road. After internment, he was then burnt in effigy by an enthusiastic mob.
Jack is survived by his widow, Molly Black, and her sixteen children. "Who will take care of me and me wee ones now", she has been heard to say. The earthly possessions of Jack Silver will be sold by his executor, Montague Jones in the near future to help provide for his family.
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Gwydion
Free Scholar
Posts:59
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| 01/26/2006 6:49 PM |
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Now, I shall never admit, even under torture (and this has been tried before) that I gave a rat's arse for this misbegotten Englishman, but it appears that the lower sorts that dwell within the seediest lairs of AnTir will miss him greatly... I know the many Innkeepers he owes will. I can recall seeing him on the warfield with his counterpart Humphrey Pennyworth, eagerly looting the dead (where he claimed they were actually seeing to the wounded, but the only medical equipment I saw was a sturdy mallet in Humphrey's hands) whilst the rest of us actually fought. I shall remember this piece of filth as a rogue, a dastardly scoundrel, and the bandit with enough low-born charisma to rally more of his kind under one banner for several years until obviously (to me at least) one of his compatriots finally did him in... has anyone heard from Humphrey Pennyworth by the way?
Jack was an original sort (by saying "original" I really mean "repugnant"), that sold his firearms by the box to many of the more nefarious sorts throughout the Knowne World, and on his own, may have been the primary reason for the escalation of arms on the various warfields of AnTir... Aye, you know some WS are having a toast to Jack's demise right now.
In the end though, even this scheming, wily Englishman could not protect his back forever... really, has anyone seen Humphrey Pennyworth?
Ever the entrepeneur, Jack will do in death what he tried to do with every tavern wench... fill a hole.
Lord Gwydion MacBairn
Captain of the Manticore
"No, he's NOT my friend, I don't even know him, I have no idea where your daughter is!" |
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God defend me from my friends; from my enemies I can defend myself.
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Mat
Provost
Posts:123
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| 01/27/2006 12:26 AM |
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Ya know what I say we do!
I say we dig up Jack's corpse and hang it from the ankles to a pole and use it as a flag for the castle at clinton with the words "Magister mundi sum!" tattooed across the chest!  |
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Git-r-dun! |
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molly_black
Novice
Posts:1
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| 01/28/2006 7:00 AM |
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Jack Silver’s passing away is a sad thing…which is a bit of a surprise because though I loved him I was fairly certain he was not at all a good man. But he was a fun man, he loved rapier and he was always up for a drink and a good story. Without him, I am afraid I cannot stand to be at the old haunts and with the old crowds we used to share together. With that in mind I am taking up the kind invitation of Jack’s cousin Montague Jones (though a Puritan still a better shot than Jack ever was, due to lack of constant drunkenness, one might suspect) and leaving for the colonies with him on Wednesday morning.
To those of you I’ve come to know I’d like to bid you thanks and a fond farewell since like Jack I’m moving on to another place and won’t be seeing you again. I’ve had some good times and will remember my time with you well. I’m sure if Jack was doing anything other than rotting in a grave right now he’d want to say goodbye as well.
As Jack’s widow I’m helping Montague sell the estate at www.rapier.ca … if you check out the sale it would be much appreciated – Jack left me behind with a houseful of hungry mouths to feed (thirteen, not sixteen as Jack was fond of saying…either because of superstition or because he was never very good at counting) and I only have four days left before my ship sets sail. Many things have sold. We’ve also added new ones as I’ve emptied out various armoires, wardrobes and a barrack’s worth of weapons. I’m adjusting the prices on some things as I simply cannot take them with me to the New World.
Good Wishes to You All,
Molly Black
P.S. The best deal in the entire estate sale may be the sale of www.rapier.ca the site itself... |
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Guillemin
Provost
Posts:120
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| 01/31/2006 10:51 AM |
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A sad day to lose two so worthy individuals in such a short time span. We'll miss you both so much.
Quad War hardly seems worth going to without the Traitors wandering around making touble. |
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Guillemin de Rouen
Cadet to Raoul Delaroche
Rapier Champion of Avacal |
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